For months, my wife, daughters, and I had been looking forward to our family trip to Orlando, Florida. We’d planned it meticulously, booked our stay early, researched all the best attractions, and at the top of our list — even above the theme parks — was this one water resort. It had rave reviews, wild…More
Category Archives: Epic Poop Stories
A river runs through him 💩 🚣🏼
It started like any other leisurely kayak outing. My brother and I had decided to spend the afternoon paddling around the lake, pretending we were rugged explorers instead of two suburbanites with water bottles and SPF 50 sunscreen. The weather was perfect — blue sky, a soft breeze, and the gentle lapping of water against…More
The Laxative Chronicles: A Tale of Ice Cream and Regret 🍦
The rumble started as a subtle complaint, a gurgle of discontent somewhere in the lower reaches of my abdomen. A week – seven whole days – had passed since my last successful trip to the porcelain throne. At first, the situation was an inconvenience, then a discomfort. Now, it felt like I’d swallowed a particularly…More
The morning poop and how I found my keys 💩 🔑
I was on my way to work. Normally it’s a 40-minute drive, but there was an accident on a bridge, so I had to sit tight for the time being. The minutes passed. The comfortable morning dump threshold was reaching critical mass after the daily energy drink and breakfast burrito. I’d been sitting in traffic…More
Brown Sands, New Mexico 🌵💩
It was a bright, cloudless morning when we pulled into White Sands National Park, excited for a day of sledding and exploration. The dunes stretched out before us like a blinding ocean of snow, soft and endless. The kids were already bouncing in the backseat, eager to tumble down the hills and dig to their…More
Cookie Catastrophe 🍪💩
It seemed like a normal Monday night at the frat house. We had just wrapped up our weekly meeting and were gearing up for Monday Night Football on the veranda when our sister sorority, the Kappa Deltas, wandered in with a massive plate of chocolate chip cookies—a special delivery for a couple of our brothers.…More
The School Pickup Poopocalypse 🚗💩
Let me set the scene: It’s a typical afternoon in the school pickup line. We’re parked, bumper to bumper, about ten minutes before dismissal. Cars are stacked behind us, no room to maneuver. In the back seat, my five-year-old, Oliver, is blissfully absorbed in a game on his tablet. Oliver: “I need to poop.” Me:…More